What's the Worst that could Happen?

I'm pretty sure this has got to be a low point in my nearly 30 years of existence. I'm over $70,000 in credit card debt.
I'm trying to dump 2 bad real estate deals.
I just found out that 2 of my properties may already have been auctioned off.

I had to give up the best apartment I've ever lived in. I lied by ommission to my gf about my financial situation.We aren't broken up but we won't be living together for a while. To be more precise, I'm technically homeless.
I sold or gave away most of my stuff.

I'm selling my car. Which happens to be the best car I've ever had. The stuff I do have is stashed with my gf and homie.

I'm working a shitty temp job at a call center. (I don't care how much you LOVE the people at work. A shit job is still a shit job.)It's shitty for me because it pays not enough. What's worse is how great people can become less than great when they are being paid to let people dump on them. I got what I asked for: "Lindsey, I want to get paid the most for the least amount of work." I got what I asked for.

I don't have a real job,
I'm not doing any real business.
I'm not selling anything,
I'm not getting paid for anything
My book is not done.
I haven't done any talks all summer.
I've just been "omitting" to myself.


How I'm feeling?

1. I'm at the bottom of a well. I see the light above me. but it looks like I need to climb about 200 feet straight up to get out of the mess I'm in.

2. I've built up this nice looking house. It looks nice but the workmanship isn't. I'm standing in the middle of my house and the walls are falling all around me. What I've built up is falling on me.

3. helpless. weak. embarrassed. unworthy. like a failure. like i've let down myself and those I love the most.

What you don't know is that I feel and know that my friends and family are looking to me to lead them. They want someone to show them a way out of their current situations. Into a more secure, abundant and fulfilling life. I know this. I feel this. I have accepted this great honor.

This is why I feel so terrible about my current situation. Trust me, I've beat myself up pretty bad. Have you seen the movie Fight Club? Remember the first time Ed Norton beat the shit out of Brad Pitt? That's what I've done to myself inside my mind.

HOW CAN I HELP ANYONE, IF I CAN'T EVEN HELP MYSELF! I fucked up. I got to start over. This is the worst that could happen. When you take a shot and come up short...All you can do is get up. Dust yourself off. And keep moving.

Lesson 1: PERSISTENCE. The faster you can get up after a fall, the farther ahead you will go.

Lesson 2: PATIENCE. Don't be so hard on yourself. Anything worthwhile takes practice and work.

Lesson 3: PERSPECTIVE. If you are still ALIVE after your entire WORLD falls apart, THAT AIN'T BAD!